TOADLIQUOR – The Hortator’s Lament

TOADLIQUOR specializes in agonizing, beyond slow doom metal delivered at a snail’s pace. Over the course of the generous seventy-two minute album, TOADLIQUOR unleashes riff after droning riff with some of the most sluggish, drunken drumming not heard since GRIEF‘s classic Dismal album. The bulk of The Hortator’s Lament is compiled from their self-titled LP released back in ’94, but now packaged along with some obscure extras, TOADLIQUOR‘s depravity can finally be revealed to the Justin Timberlake/Avril Lavigne-buying public. They will no doubt revel in the abundance of catchy hooks and melodies found on tracks such as “Gnaw,” “Charred” and “Nails.” All kidding aside, The Hortator’s Lament is such a weighty, overwhelmingly lethargic affair, that even diehard doom addicts may have a hard time finding very many memorable riffs to sink their teeth into. Unlike CATHEDRAL, who provide the occasional, soft acoustic hippy jam or MY DYING BRIDE, who offer dark, sombre piano pieces to at least give the listener a breather during the proceedings, TOADLIQUOR will have none of that. Instead, they prefer to draw out and drag each and every mind-numbing riff as long as humanly possible. So for those of you that feel that the likes of EYEHATEGOD and WARHORSE have gotten too commercial or up-tempo, then The Hortator’s Lament is the album you have been waiting for. (Southern Lord)

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